Thursday 31 May 2007

Like flies to a sugar bowl.

This is getting ridiculous. Last night, for the third time in as many months, I didn't even have to leave the comfort of my own kitchen to find someone to fuck.

We were supposed to go to the pub, but then my friends got stoned and I was too involved in Big Brother to move, so we just had drinks in the flat instead. When we were all good and hammered, two of my flatmates came home with a couple of guys they knew - turns out one of them comes from the next town over to my hometown, so we got talking. Somehow that graduated to "can I have your number?", then the dancing started (that tells you how mashed we all were - in 8 months of living here, we have never once had an impromptu dance party in the kitchen). It was just a short step from that to being dragged into my room and stripped of my clothes.

I didn't even have to try. Honestly, it's getting far too easy.

Good sex, not the most well-endowed of men, but made up for it in enthusiasm. Plus something he said really pushed my buttons without him even knowing it: "You're so sexy, I just want to bite you." Rrrrooowwrr!

There was an awkward moment when we did it the second time - once we'd finished, the condom was nowhere to be found. I immediately started planning how soon I could get to the doctors, but a quick trip to the loo and a bit of digging around solved the problem. It was an incredibly weird feeling, rooting around in my own ladygarden; I don't go in there very often, preferring to concentrate on the exterior, plus I'm quite small so it was a struggle to get enough fingers in there to retrieve the poor lost rubber. But retrieve it I did. Hopefully an experience that will never be repeated.

Anyway, I think we'll be going out for drinks on Friday, so that's nice.

As for the man I've been sleeping with on and off for the past month (the one mentioned below, whom I quite like but who chose exam revision over sex - I forgave him for that, incidentally), well, I sent him a message two days ago and he still hasn't got back to me. Therefore all privileges are suspended until further notice, leaving me free to "see" other people. You snooze, you lose.

Monday 28 May 2007

Last night was horrendous.

We'd been looking forward to this drum&bass night for weeks, but unfortunately the pills we took were...just not good. My flatmate and I were both really nauseous, then we went really incredibly cold, and even though we took them 24 hours ago, we're both still up now (in an edgy, paranoid, I've ground my teeth down to stumps, why are my pupils still the size of dinner plates way). I haven't slept for 36 hours, it's just not happening. Now, I've only done pills four times in my life, but I've never had an experience like this one before and hopefully I never will again. I feel absolutely wretched.

Plus I was supposed to meet my potential new man there, but I felt so ill that I just had to go home. Good job really, because it turns out he and his mates had a dodgy batch as well and were in the same boat as my flatmate and me.

Christ. I wonder what was in them?

Wednesday 23 May 2007

So tonight I did it backwards.

My shag du jour came over at six, we got it on for an hour or three, then I went out with my friends. I've never done it that way round before - normally my sexin' hours are from 1am til 4 (approx). But I quite like this, it means I've had my fill beforehand so I don't spend the whole night speculating on whom I'm going to be taking home. The pressure's off. Yeah, I could get used to this.

Tuesday 22 May 2007

Thursday 17 May 2007

A quick tip:

If I invite you over and you say no, you've got to revise for exams, that's fine. I'm not unreasonable, I know how tough exams can be.

If I text you to invite you over after said exams and you don't respond, ok then. Maybe the message didn't go through, or you're out with your friends celebrating said exam cessation.

If I send you a message flat-out asking you to do something this weekend (Friday or Saturday, I'm easy (in more ways than one)) and you don't have the courtesy to reply...well, bearing in mind I'm a bloody good fuck and you're not even my usual type, I have one question:

Who's the bigger fool? You or me?

It's definitely true

that the more sex you have, the more you want. Last week I slept with two guys, after a dry spell of about six weeks or more, and now I am bouncing off the fucking walls. It's not even about orgasms, since I'm the only one who's able to do that for myself. It's about having a body on top of me, pressing down, sweat mingling. It's about listening to someone else moan and groan and gasp and tell me how good it feels.

Ultimately, it's about power isn't it.

Wednesday 16 May 2007

Restless sleep.

The other night I had a dream about the hospital I used to work in. I was delivering something to the secure unit (in reality there is no secure unit, but you know, subconscious) and they accidentally locked me in. When I finally got out one of the patients followed me and I was trying to run away but my feet wouldn't move fast enough. I hate that dream-running thing - I either bounce along above the ground, occasionally putting a foot down to keep me going, or I'm desperate to go faster but all I can do is keep plodding along at walking pace. It's so frustrating and it always leaves me with a feeling of dread when I wake up.

Anyone know anything about dreams? And while you're at it, what about dreaming your teeth are falling out? That's another one I have quite regularly. The only other thing that recurrs is orgasming in my sleep, but I think I can explain that one prety well for myself.

Friday 11 May 2007

I am covered

in hickeys. Why do men think it's a good thing to leave me branded, so the whole world can see what a whore I am?

Seriously, I've got so many on my neck right now that I look like I've got some horrible disease. Un. Im. Pressed.

Wednesday 9 May 2007

I got laid!

Hurrah!

Sunday night started out as a night in - Friday had been a big one and Saturday was spent coming down, so Sunday was supposed to be relaxing and early night-ish. However, my flatmate O came home from her weekend away, still drunk from 4 days of solid drinking, and before I knew it the two of us were knocking back vodka like there was no tomorrow. Some people she knows were going to this drum&bass night, which was practically right next door to our place, so we decided to tag along.

I swear to god, it was so hot I thought I was going to pass out (this was the place, not the sex. I'll get to that in a minute.) I had a couple of shots of tequila and danced for about 3 hours straight, then when I was sweaty as all hell, started looking around for a potential victim. Voila - there was one, not two feet away from me, giving me the eye. I danced over and stole a sip of his beer (that always seems to be a winner, somehow) and he offered to buy me a drink of my own, so we wandered to the bar...to find it closed! It was only 2 o'clock, the place was hotter than Hades, and I was dying for a sip of water, but it was not to be. So I invited him back to my room for "a drink".

Once there, he looked at the photos on my wall and said "Oh, that's [insert my best friend's name here]." We'll call her B - she and I were at university together the first time, in the Midlands, and she has absolutely no connection to where I am now. Turns out he went to that uni too, a year or so below us, and lived with her in third year, when she and I were on non-speakers. So he knows her and all the other people I once lived with (before they shunned me, but that's another story).

How random is that? Out of the however many hundred people were in the building that night, I pick him. The world is ridiculously small, I'm telling you.

Anyway, we proceeded to get it on for the next 8 hours - I think we slept for about 20 minutes the whole time. He'd taken something that meant he found it really hard to shoot his load, so it was like having my own Real Doll, except not creepy. I just went to town. Normally I don't spend much time on top because I don't really know what I'm doing up there and I get a bit self-conscious after about 2 minutes, but he sort of coached me through it and the upshot was, I reeeeealllly enjoyed myself. Still no orgasm, but it was so much fun regardless.*

And now...I think I quite like him, against my better judgement. We've been texting, but he's got exams to revise for and I'm back at my parents' this weekend so I probably won't see him until next week. But I will see him, because I haven't been sorted out like that for a long long time, and I want more.

*Just realised I haven't mentioned my inability to come with someone else in the room. Will produce a post about that soon.

Thursday 3 May 2007

Go and vote

in the One D At A Time cock contest (link over to your right). I've got my favourite; who's yours?