So much for celibacy.

On Sunday I took some stuff back to the flat in Manchester, ready for moving back in after the Christmas hols. I was spending the night there because my sort-of fuck buddy was supposed to come round, but by midnight there was neither sight nor sound of him. And so I had a couple of drinks to calm my iritation. Vodka. I'm beginning to realise vodka makes me completely uninhibited. And horny.

So I find myself Facebook flirting with this guy I sort of know - friend of a friend, I met him at a party last month when I was still seeing the last guy, and we got on well and had a laugh. It's midnight, I thought I was going to get laid and hadn't, so I thought fuck it and asked him if he wanted to come round.

He did, complete with a bottle of Southern Comfort.

We spent a couple of hours talking and laughing, and then of course we slept together. He spent the night, it wasn't awkward in the morning - all very civil. He's a really nice guy, plus he had a hairy chest. Been a while since I've seen one of those. But there was no real heat, no desire - I just wanted to get laid and he was willing, simple as that.

So I've gone back on my no casual sex resolution already. But I feel good about it - he's not a complete stranger and we did actually have a conversation before getting down to it. Besides, I'm just not the celibate type.

New Years Eve was awesome!

We spent midnight in a car in Manchester town centre, looking for a parking space so we could go to this bar. But it was the best NYE I've had in years. I was with my cousins, my best friends, laughing my head off. I couldn't have asked for more.

AND, so far in 2008 I haven't had sex. Which means I haven't slept with anyone inappropriate, yay! This bodes well for my new year's resolution, which is: stop shagging around. Unless the guy's really hot.

Yep, he's dumped.

I've got rid of my boyfriend. Is he a boyfriend, if I've only been with him for six weeks? Anyway, we've broken up.

You know when you meet someone and you don't feel the "click", but the two of you end up getting together anyway and even though you know it's not right, you just go with it because you've been single for ages and it's nice to be with someone? Yeah, that's how we were. He had an amazing body and a massive cock, but he was also four years younger than me, for one (20 to 24), and for another, he just wasn't right. He doesn't read (I can't even get into the shower without a book in my hand), he's a smoker (it makes me gag just to smell smoke on someone), and he's INCREDIBLY possesive (he was jealous of all my ex-boyfriends, the most recent of which I'd broken up with two years before.). Plus he never complimented me, and more often than not made me feel like a loser. Every previous boyfriend I've had has made me feel like a princess, and I don't think that's an unreasonable request; this one made fun of my bad skin, my little poochy belly and my dress sense. I've already got enough of a downer on myself, dude, I don't need someone else dragging me down too.

So now I'm looking forward to New Year's Eve - new year, new start. I'm going to get myself together mentally and physically, and start treating myself like I should - with respect and dignity. Happy 2008 everyone!

Not again.

I'm having major problems with this new boyfriend. How do you detach from someone who has surgically attached himself to your hip?

More tomorrow. Right now I'm going to bed with Heat magazine.

Walking home from my night out...

Random guy waiting for taxi, quite quietly to his friend: Ooh redheads, my favourite.
Me: [overhearing, looks over shoulder and smiles - he was under 30 and cute, you've got to give them some encouragement.]
Him: Tell me you're Irish.
Me: [over shoulder, still walking] I am.
Him: Take me home.

It's amazing how such a small thing can give you such a massive ego boost. I'm going to bed with a smile on my face.

Is there such a thing

as too big a penis?

Because I met a guy on Tuesday, and we've spent the last 4 days together, and I really like him, and his cock is MASSIVE. But he takes ages to come, so it starts off as "ooh yeah" and ends up as "oh...yeah."

He's adorable though. And he's not going to disappear into the great beyond (ok, I've said that before but this time I can guarentee it because he's pretty enthusiastic about me).

But yeah, the huge dick thing. On the plus side, he knows what to do with it. On the minus side, I'm on this stupid pill which makes my period unpredicable, so he's only ever known me while I'm bleeding. On the plus side again, he doesn't seem to mind that. Anyone have any tips for what to do with a giant penis?

I'm not meeting father of my aborted foetus tonight. He texted me a couple of days ago saying "sorry, really busy on Sat. Think we should forget the whole thing." Ok dude, you've just made my dilemma a whole lot easier. Never thought I'd be thanking you, but thanks a million!

Help me!

I need some impartial advice.

The guy who got me pregnant texted me this weekend, asking to meet up. Haven't heard from him since June, but apparently I met him during "a very fucked up period" in his life and he's been thinking about me and wants another chance to see me. Okay, great, I'll probably meet up with him if only to find out where he disappeared to and show my disapproval, but here's the thing - what if, when I see him, I can't stop myself from blurting out "you got me pregnant!"?

Or is that a good thing? Should I tell him? Does he deserve to know? I haven't told a single person, but surely if I'm going to tell anyone, it should be him? It's not like we're going to have a long term relationship - he's nice and everything, but it's not a love match - so is that a reason to spill or a reason to keep it zipped? (my mouth, not his zipper. That's definitely staying closed this time.)

I've been holding on to this information for months, and I sort of feel like if I tell anyone it'll weaken me. Like if anyone knows, it's a chink in my armour and they'll think I'm weak. That's why I don't really talk about my lovelife with people I know, because if I'm all excited about someone and it doesn't work out then I'll look stupid. Which is stupid in itself - you're supposed to be able to talk to your friends about pretty much anything without being judged. But I don't like to make myself vulnerable.

Anyway, I'm getting off the subject. The big question: should I tell him? Actually, should I even see him? Opinions please.