Like flies to a sugar bowl.

This is getting ridiculous. Last night, for the third time in as many months, I didn't even have to leave the comfort of my own kitchen to find someone to fuck.

We were supposed to go to the pub, but then my friends got stoned and I was too involved in Big Brother to move, so we just had drinks in the flat instead. When we were all good and hammered, two of my flatmates came home with a couple of guys they knew - turns out one of them comes from the next town over to my hometown, so we got talking. Somehow that graduated to "can I have your number?", then the dancing started (that tells you how mashed we all were - in 8 months of living here, we have never once had an impromptu dance party in the kitchen). It was just a short step from that to being dragged into my room and stripped of my clothes.

I didn't even have to try. Honestly, it's getting far too easy.

Good sex, not the most well-endowed of men, but made up for it in enthusiasm. Plus something he said really pushed my buttons without him even knowing it: "You're so sexy, I just want to bite you." Rrrrooowwrr!

There was an awkward moment when we did it the second time - once we'd finished, the condom was nowhere to be found. I immediately started planning how soon I could get to the doctors, but a quick trip to the loo and a bit of digging around solved the problem. It was an incredibly weird feeling, rooting around in my own ladygarden; I don't go in there very often, preferring to concentrate on the exterior, plus I'm quite small so it was a struggle to get enough fingers in there to retrieve the poor lost rubber. But retrieve it I did. Hopefully an experience that will never be repeated.

Anyway, I think we'll be going out for drinks on Friday, so that's nice.

As for the man I've been sleeping with on and off for the past month (the one mentioned below, whom I quite like but who chose exam revision over sex - I forgave him for that, incidentally), well, I sent him a message two days ago and he still hasn't got back to me. Therefore all privileges are suspended until further notice, leaving me free to "see" other people. You snooze, you lose.

Last night was horrendous.

We'd been looking forward to this drum&bass night for weeks, but unfortunately the pills we took were...just not good. My flatmate and I were both really nauseous, then we went really incredibly cold, and even though we took them 24 hours ago, we're both still up now (in an edgy, paranoid, I've ground my teeth down to stumps, why are my pupils still the size of dinner plates way). I haven't slept for 36 hours, it's just not happening. Now, I've only done pills four times in my life, but I've never had an experience like this one before and hopefully I never will again. I feel absolutely wretched.

Plus I was supposed to meet my potential new man there, but I felt so ill that I just had to go home. Good job really, because it turns out he and his mates had a dodgy batch as well and were in the same boat as my flatmate and me.

Christ. I wonder what was in them?

So tonight I did it backwards.

My shag du jour came over at six, we got it on for an hour or three, then I went out with my friends. I've never done it that way round before - normally my sexin' hours are from 1am til 4 (approx). But I quite like this, it means I've had my fill beforehand so I don't spend the whole night speculating on whom I'm going to be taking home. The pressure's off. Yeah, I could get used to this.

Blood cells crystallizing...

...is that a good thing?

A quick tip:

If I invite you over and you say no, you've got to revise for exams, that's fine. I'm not unreasonable, I know how tough exams can be.

If I text you to invite you over after said exams and you don't respond, ok then. Maybe the message didn't go through, or you're out with your friends celebrating said exam cessation.

If I send you a message flat-out asking you to do something this weekend (Friday or Saturday, I'm easy (in more ways than one)) and you don't have the courtesy to reply...well, bearing in mind I'm a bloody good fuck and you're not even my usual type, I have one question:

Who's the bigger fool? You or me?

It's definitely true

that the more sex you have, the more you want. Last week I slept with two guys, after a dry spell of about six weeks or more, and now I am bouncing off the fucking walls. It's not even about orgasms, since I'm the only one who's able to do that for myself. It's about having a body on top of me, pressing down, sweat mingling. It's about listening to someone else moan and groan and gasp and tell me how good it feels.

Ultimately, it's about power isn't it.

Restless sleep.

The other night I had a dream about the hospital I used to work in. I was delivering something to the secure unit (in reality there is no secure unit, but you know, subconscious) and they accidentally locked me in. When I finally got out one of the patients followed me and I was trying to run away but my feet wouldn't move fast enough. I hate that dream-running thing - I either bounce along above the ground, occasionally putting a foot down to keep me going, or I'm desperate to go faster but all I can do is keep plodding along at walking pace. It's so frustrating and it always leaves me with a feeling of dread when I wake up.

Anyone know anything about dreams? And while you're at it, what about dreaming your teeth are falling out? That's another one I have quite regularly. The only other thing that recurrs is orgasming in my sleep, but I think I can explain that one prety well for myself.